[Because 9 is my lucky number].

I SO want that bat-trapeze-girl as a print or poster for my craft room!

 I love, love, loooove this new photo of us! [Part of the "dark future metal" re-design]. I like that it looks like it's from a movie poster, because we're trying to keep our "cinematic" quality alive in the visuals, as well as the music. I love that this looks like it's straight from an Italian "Giallo" Murder Mystery. This is the image that we're printing on labels for our press kits. So on the cover of a red folder, labels will see this photo of us first. I wish I could tell you what our press kit envelopes look like, but... it's a bit of a secret that I don't want to give away. I have been hearing from our contacts that it's a very effective tactic.

 Probably only Bonnie will truly understand the meaning of that entry title, and that's okay by me!

*Breathing For a Moment*

SO. MUCH. GOING. ON. Where do I even begin?

Personal Stuff

For a while, I was blogging pretty deeply here about personal issues, in hopes that maybe those entries could help somebody else who's facing the same problems. Well, after a few weeks, I decided to remove those entries because I've found a way to share myself with others anonymously.

I admitted myself to a 12-Step program exactly six weeks ago, and that's when I decided to remove the entries. My main problem - all of my hugest problems - in life revolve around the fact that I am an addict. Although I [obviously] don't mind making it public that I'm recovering from addiction, I don't really feel compelled to share the sordid "process" here anymore. Not because I can't trust you all, but because... well... now that my band is starting to become more and more known, I just don't really want people to have the ability to track down every intimate detail of my journey. If it comes out in interviews, that's one thing - I won't hesitate to share, because I would hope that my story would help my fans and peers. But I also don't want to make myself so vulnerable in public that there is nothing left for me and the few people in my life that I know I can trust with my entire self. -And many of those trusted "few" are listed in that side bar to the left over there.

Many of you have known me since I first started blogging in... jeez... 2001? That's a long damn time to know somebody - even longer than high school or college friends. With that said, if you want to be in on this journey with me, I am totally fine with sharing it... just not here. Email me and I'll send you a link. It is on another blog, but it's completely anonymous. I have no problem sharing the sordid details with any one of you, I just don't want my fans to be in on so much of me that nothing is sacred anymore. And you don't have to say a word at the other place - it gets pretty raw over there... but if you want to "go there" with me, you can. Just ask me [and I won't be offended if you don't ask me]!

Recovery = Opportunity

So ever since I started the recovery process, it has felt like my life has come un-stuck. I mean, it's not like I was doing horribly for myself before, but I knew that I wasn't living my full potential. So.... it finally clicks with me that I have a disease to battle, and I start getting treatment. Shortly after I started getting treatment, WHAMO! The flood gates of amazingness have opened up for me, and I am... humbled and amazed at all of the wonderful things that have started literally coming in, as if I've opened a door. The journey's been difficult, too, don't get me wrong, it's really tough opening old wounds for the sake of true closure. But... damn. Had I known how truly easy it is to get that sort of help and clean out all of those wounds, I would have done this a long, long, time ago... but I was in denial. I had to hit a rock bottom first, and I did hit mine. And now, the healing is opening the valve.

The Band

We did a new photo shoot earlier this month, and a Blade Runner-esque redesign that we're very happy with. Our fans like it too! We're trying to get away from the "oooooh, I'm a spooooky gothy band" and more into Gothic and Pinup meets Sci-Fi and Horror... because G is Sci-Fi/Horror and I'm Gothic/Pinup... so it's a great way to combine what we each bring to the table stylistically.

Just in the last month, we've been approached regarding a tour in the Fall of 2007 - an arena tour in which each band is on one stage, and gets 45 minute sets! A huge band in our genre has signed onto the tour, so it would be amazing to get on the tour. Nothing is definite yet, so I'm not going to reveal any details... but no matter what happens, we know with all of our hearts that we'll be playing live and touring in 2007.

We've also been approached by a head hunter who places music in soundtracks. He's interested in shopping Fantomatique around! I can't divulge any details on this yet, but after doing some homework, I found out that he IS "legit." He's listed on the IMDB in film credits [including The Ring and War of the Worlds]! G and I are going to schedule a conference call with him and see what happens. It was just a relief to discover that he's "legit," because there's a lot of jackals out there that try to take advantage of indie bands. If this goes through, I will definitely follow up with a link to his site, so that you can see what this guy's business is all about... it's really great, and he will get nothing but promotion from us if this leads to something. [He's also placed songs on lots of TV shows including Grey's Anatomy, Charmed, ER, The Shield and Las Vegas]! So if we get a good relationship with him at least, this could be the start of... okay, um... this could just be an amazing open door for us. Oh, and he came to us! He found us at CD Baby and he loves "Fantomatique."

The Day Job

As all of this greatness has been arriving at my door step in my personal life, it's beginning to parallel at my day job. In short, I've come up with such a revolutionary idea at work, my boss is helping me to write a kickass pitch for it. The idea is SO good, I've copyrighted it. It could change the face of television, I'm not even kidding. If my network doesn't buy the pitch, I'm taking it elsewhere, it's that good. I'm hoping to get out to LA and make the pitch myself, and I'm really hoping that I will finally get the pay raise and promotion that I truly deserve. That's the plan.

Busy Bee Blogger

So now I'm really, really busy and unable to blog a lot, but it's all for really great reasons. I just hate it because it's all stuff that I can't really talk about yet, because it's in the "seed" stages... I promise you, the moment I see any sprouts or flowers, I'm going to be sure and let you all in on it!

Until then, I'll try to at least get my ass over here for some silly quiz stress relief or something. -And to read your blogs and catch up with you all... I miss you and I'm sorry that I haven't been able to be as social lately!